fine_clarity (fine_clarity) wrote in polyparents,

Polyamory and the different variants of love

'Love' encompasses a wide range of emotions. Any variant of love is characterized by a feeling of 'softness'. There are 2 component emotions, which can act either alone or in combination, to produce love. Those component emotions are oneness and humility.

In a love relationship, the emotion of oneness, if it is present in the relationship, causes the behaviors of telling eachother everything about oneself and one's recent events, always telling the truth, not keeping secrets, and doing everything together or otherwise always keeping in contact. The emotion of oneness can also be detected in the tone of voice when in the company of eachother.

In a love relationship, the emotion of humility, if it is present in the relationship, causes a gentle weakness in one's regard to eachother, and this is expressed both in one's demeanor toward eachother and in one's manner of affection. One behavior that humility is conducive to is bowing, though this of course is not a behavior that is associated with love relationships, though there is the antiquated behavior of bowing while kissing a woman on the back of the hand.

Exclusive monoamory is based upon egotistical dominant-territorialism, which is the opposite of humility. Therefore, people whose love is of the exclusive monoamorous sort can not incorporate humility into their love, but only oneness. It must be noted that one's egotism is only frustrated when one shares one's partner(s) with other people, not when oneself has multiple partners. Even among polyamorists, polygyny is somewhat more common than polyandry, because males are the more egotistical gender on the average.

Dominant egotism does not always express itself in a given particular way, such that there is some chance that a given egotistical person shares (or is willing to share) one's love partner(s) with others. For example, egotism, when combined with oneness, causes the behavior of libellously ascribing egotism to the logical behavior of acknowledging fundamental definitions and distinctions between different ways of living or beliefs. -That is an egotistical behavior that is sometimes displayed by polyamorists.

It is likely though that a given person that shares ones partner(s) lacks dominant egotism. That would allow such a person to use humility as a component of their love, or to use love that is purely humility-derived, such that it does not incorporate oneness at all.
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